Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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