I love how its suddenly "not all about sex" now that he can't get it up
no. you can't hotbox the world.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
