That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
Randomize