I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
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