Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Dating After Heartbreak
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
These Images Prove Chrissy Teigen is the Funniest Model Alive
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.