We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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