There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
Did I show you my penis last night?
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
