my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize