you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
