Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I needed to pee, so I climbed out his window
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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