how can u be prego again
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
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