I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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