I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Randomize
