no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
They're giving me a hotel, and this chick doesn't have a place to stay for the night... I swear this is how real life Porno starts.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I can now say I know getting hit in the face with a flying tortilla is not fun
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
