Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
You may now shotgun with the bride
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
