Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
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