THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I sent the random girl I had sex with last night a 'happy mothers day' text as a reminder to get the morning after pill.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
She touched my penis and started laughing. She did the same thing when she blew me.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
Randomize
