I am in a vortex of obligation.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
After skinny dipping in your pond, I think me and tequila have added a whole new dynamic to our relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
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