the new term for farting is butt boxing.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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