i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
hey, do you know how many packets of jello it takes to turn a handle of vodka into slutty girls?
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
