Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Randomize
