Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
Randomize