Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

Favorite
(603): View more from New Hampshire

Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'

(1-603): View more from New Hampshire

that's awkward

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(603): Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple' (1-603): that's awkward http://tfl.nu/90bf

Replies (5) Good night (1010) Bad night (2437)
Favorite
(704): View more from North Carolina

i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background

(1-704): View more from North Carolina

hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(704): i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background (1-704): hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god http://tfl.nu/u7bb

Replies (47) Good night (3106) Bad night (821)
Favorite
(715): View more from Wisconsin

You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(715): You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now http://tfl.nu/q56d

Replies (59) Good night (7807) Bad night (800)
Favorite
(940): View more from Texas

I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(940): I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night. http://tfl.nu/ldko

Replies (16) Good night (935) Bad night (3609)
Favorite
(415): View more from California

And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(415): And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked. http://tfl.nu/8nhm

Replies (45) Good night (5579) Bad night (955)
Favorite
(401): View more from Rhode Island

He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(401): He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity.. http://tfl.nu/e3ua

Replies (16) Good night (2243) Bad night (4873)
Favorite
(262): View more from Wisconsin

Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(262): Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour. http://tfl.nu/rkpz

Replies (5) Good night (2578) Bad night (1100)
Favorite
(315): View more from New York

i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV

(802): View more from Vermont

you're the only one i would trust to do that

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(315): i'll get you drunk even if i have to inject alcohol into your arm through an IV (802): you're the only one i would trust to do that http://tfl.nu/yrsp

Replies (8) Good night (2620) Bad night (892)
Favorite
(425): View more from Washington

I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.

(1-425): View more from Washington

I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(425): I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help. (1-425): I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity. http://tfl.nu/3ise

Replies (4) Good night (1604) Bad night (715)
Favorite
(978): View more from Massachusetts

You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(978): You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone. http://tfl.nu/5mak

Replies (23) Good night (1960) Bad night (978)
Favorite
(914): View more from New York

Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(914): Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block. http://tfl.nu/om9a

Replies (0) Good night (574) Bad night (352)
Favorite
(613): View more from Ontario

you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(613): you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers. http://tfl.nu/797e

Replies (3) Good night (1218) Bad night (405)
Favorite
(541): View more from Oregon

25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(541): 25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that. http://tfl.nu/kj3r

Replies (12) Good night (648) Bad night (882)
Favorite
(801): View more from Utah

At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(801): At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it. http://tfl.nu/2oiv

Replies (4) Good night (424) Bad night (542)
Favorite
(585): View more from New York

My inner pteradactyl is also confused.

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard
(585): My inner pteradactyl is also confused. http://tfl.nu/ve6u

Replies (3) Good night (744) Bad night (263)

Randomize

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

Find Us On: