Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
