can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
It's 9:07 in the morning and I am so hungover right now I'm about to take the kids I'm babysitting to mf'ing Popeyes bc that's all I want in this world
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
