Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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