And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were so drunk that some guy dressed as Harry Potter pointed his wand at you and screamed "Accio SHITSHOW"
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Randomize