that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize