so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Randomize
