i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
I just made princess spaghettios..and I wonder why she broke up with me for not being mature enough.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
The homeless guy out front said it's his birthday and he asked us to join him for happy hour after work. He's buying a fifth of gin to celebrate.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Randomize