i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Randomize
