My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
