have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Got my bloodwork back and my liver is in tip top shape. Apparently blacking out 5 nights a week isn't cutting it, so we've got to step it up until I see that all of my hard work is actually paying off and doing some damage.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
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