Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
