i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize
