he didn't want to fuck because he was too busy skateboarding. what are we 12? I'm too old for this shit.
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Randomize
