Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize