what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
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