I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
Randomize
