We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
Guy Shares All The ‘New Discoveries’ He’s Made Since Moving In With His Girlfriend And It’s Hilariously Relatable
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!