Already got asked if we're dating
Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey this is Madison. you gave me your number last night and asked me to remind you that you didn't fuck anyone. you okay?
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
I really need to create fewer "the time I was on drugs" stories for my future memoir, "my first year in San Francisco".
good luck with that
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize