there's paper in my vomit.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I never thought that at some point in my life I would end up in the back of a cop car dressed as Pumba #HakunaMatata
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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