Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
Operation Purity has been aborted
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
In other news, I had my first sex related injury of the school year so that's cool