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• (510): View more from California

  my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice

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• (702): View more from Nevada

  yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.

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• (651): View more from Minnesota

  What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds

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  These 19 Deaths Are Ironically Hilarious

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party

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• (803): View more from South Carolina

  just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car

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• (417): View more from Missouri

  And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?

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• (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester

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• (905): View more from Ontario

  Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.

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  These 17 Parents Decided to Cut Contact With Their Horrible Kids

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (574): View more from Indiana

  I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.

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• (424): View more from California

  Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.

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• (949): View more from California

  We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive

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• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage

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