Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?

(412): View more from Pennsylvania

I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?

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(412): Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option? (412): I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be? http://tfl.nu/cvc8

Replies (82) Good night (2882) Bad night (628)
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(518): View more from New York

Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.

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(518): Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower. http://tfl.nu/xf7t

Replies (17) Good night (4867) Bad night (766)
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(205): View more from Alabama

Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.

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(205): Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi. http://tfl.nu/x4zy

Replies (43) Good night (1730) Bad night (4136)
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(323): View more from California

dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning

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(323): dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning http://tfl.nu/bjxg

Replies (6) Good night (3045) Bad night (1021)
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(503): View more from Oregon

iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.

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(503): iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane. http://tfl.nu/zl9e

Replies (18) Good night (6593) Bad night (1211)
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(772): View more from Florida

The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.

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(772): The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle. http://tfl.nu/irdh

Replies (12) Good night (4049) Bad night (1509)
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(513): View more from Ohio

They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.

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(513): They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real. http://tfl.nu/3nu3

Replies (32) Good night (2389) Bad night (6570)
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(206): View more from Washington

She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.

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(206): She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America. http://tfl.nu/8yw3

Replies (8) Good night (2179) Bad night (845)
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(330): View more from Ohio

BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day

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(330): BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day http://tfl.nu/u4vh

Replies (9) Good night (1711) Bad night (751)
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(816): View more from Missouri

she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.

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(816): she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex. http://tfl.nu/xnh2

Replies (3) Good night (543) Bad night (1034)
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(602): View more from Arizona

Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.

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(602): Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world. http://tfl.nu/z3pl

Replies (3) Good night (495) Bad night (904)
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(330): View more from Ohio

i've created a new STD.

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(330): i've created a new STD. http://tfl.nu/t8hp

Replies (8) Good night (422) Bad night (1361)
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(559): View more from California

I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right

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(559): I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right http://tfl.nu/jxe2

Replies (2) Good night (447) Bad night (279)
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(+61): View more from Australia

I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.

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(+61): I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes. http://tfl.nu/bcwt

Replies (3) Good night (360) Bad night (702)
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(209): View more from California

Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.

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(209): Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered. http://tfl.nu/p8yt

Replies (0) Good night (717) Bad night (272)

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