Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize