Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I have a voicemail from Mike at 1am. He starts to say something, but then throws up instead.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize
