Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I'm basically a mama hen. I keep them warm and let them wonder around the house. not to mention, I keep eye on them just in case the falcons around the house try to snatch them away.
I don't even know what to say right now
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
