You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
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