3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
You kept hiding marshmallows in the freezer saying "they would never think to look here"
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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