I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
